Silly Sunday

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WOMAN’S PERFECT BREAKFAST

She’s sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,

Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,

‘It is essential that husbands and wives know each other’s likes and dislikes.’

He addressed the man,

‘Can you name your wife’s favorite flower?’

Tom leaned over, touched his wife’s arm gently and whispered, ‘It’s Pillsbury, isn’t it?

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and

neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,

the husband asked sarcastically, ‘Relatives of yours?’

‘Yep,’ the wife replied, ‘in-laws.’

WORDS

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day…

30,000 to a man’s 15,000.

The wife replied, ‘The reason has to be because we have to
repeat everything to men….http://burntfooddude.us/?p=6733&preview=true

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, ‘What?’

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles..

The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.

He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife..

She directs him down the correct aisle.

A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.

She says, confused, ‘Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?

He answers, ‘You see, it’s like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store

to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco

and some rolling papers; cause it’s sooo-ooo–oo- ooo much cheaper.

So, I figure if I have to roll my own ………. so does she.

(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)


Feline Friday

cat rule 43

Feline Friday is simple to join. All you have to do is..

1) post a picture, drawing, cartoon or video of a cat (They may be silly or cute)

2) go up top to the menu bar and click on the Feline Friday code

3) paste the code under your cat picture

4) add your name and link

5) links without cat pictures will be deleted

6) sites that have cat pictures selling unrelated things will be deleted (EX: Cat picture on a sites that sells hats, shoes, electronics, etc.)

That’s all there is to it! Be sure to check back every so often and visit all the Feline Friday bloggers. Also, please leave a nice comment on their blogs. Nasty comments will be deleted!


Silly Sunday

texting
Daughter to Dad

TEXTING ( Communication in Today’s Generation)
Daddy, I am coming home to get married,soon. Get out your check book. LOL I’m in love with a boy who is far away from me. I am in Australia, and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on Whatsapp, he proposed to me on Skype, and now we’ve had two months of relationship through Viber. My beloved and favorite Dad, “I need your blessing, good wishes, and a really big wedding.”

Lots of love and thanks,
Your favorite daughter,
Lilly

Dads reply – also by texting

My Dear Lilly:
Like Wow! Really? Cool!
Whatever….., I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have fun on Tango, buy your kids on Amazon, and pay for it all through Paypal.

And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on Ebay.

L.O.L. (lots of love),
Daddy


Feline Friday

show me

Show me your kitties or grown cats. All you have to do is..

1) post a picture, drawing, cartoon or video of a cat (They may be silly or cute)
2) go up top to the menu bar and click on the Feline Friday code
3) paste the code under your cat picture
4) add your name and link

That’s all there is to it! Be sure to check back every so often and visit all the Feline Friday bloggers. Also, please leave a nice comment on their blogs. Nasty comments will be deleted!


Amish woman driver

amish-buggy

A police officer pulls over an old Amish woman drivng her horse and buggy’

“I’m not going to cite you,” said the officer. “I just wanted to warn you that the reflector on the back of your buggy is broken and it could be dangerous.”

“I thank thee,” replied the Amish lady. “I shall have my husband repair it as soon as I return home.”

“Also,” said the officer, “I noticed one of your reins to your horse is wrapped around his testicles. Some people might consider this cruelty to animals so you should have your husband check that too.”

“Again I thank thee. I shall have my husband check this when I get home.”

True to her word, when the Amish lady got home, she told her husband about the broken reflector.

He said he would put a new one on immediately.

“Also,” said the Amish woman, “the policeman said there was something wrong with the emergency brake.”..”

Times are a changin’

Change, some people embrace it while others seem to hate it. As I get older I wonder how my generation has coped with the fast changing world.

backing away slowly

1. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.

2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

3. You text your son’s phone to let him know it’s time to eat. He emails you back from his bedroom “What’s for dinner?”

4. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.

5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa but you haven’t spoken with your next door neighbor this year.

6. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.

7. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.

8. Every commercial on television has a web-site address at the bottom of the screen.

9. You buy a computer and 6 months later it is out of date and now sells for half the price you paid.

10. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 years of your life, is cause for panic and turning around to go get it.

11. Using real money, instead of credit or debit card, to make a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.

12. Cleaning up the dining room means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.

13. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.

14. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

15. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

16. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.

17. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

18. You get an extra phone line (or a ADSL/cable modem) so you can get phone calls.

19. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

20. You get up in morning and go online before getting your coffee.

21. You wake up at 2 am to go to the bathroom and check your E-mail on your way back to bed.

22. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)